Things that are Junior Year.
I always do these re-cap things around the end of the year, but I believe my past few “recaps” have been lost because my original tumblr was deleted, but oh well. Junior year is my favorite high-school year so far. Though I know I’m not even close to “getting there” yet, I felt like I’ve grown a lot this year, and I’ve been exposed to a lot of different things and I could not feel more thankful. I’m going to do this in bullet-point-number form (because regular bullet points don’t show up on this tumblr layout :l) to reminisce on my highlights of this year.
It doesn’t really matter what caused me to feel how I did — I don’t need to blame anything.
Anyway, I’m glad that’s over. Today I accomplished one of my social goals and I felt pretty accomplished. It’s nice to know that one doesn’t lose everything with time. Well, I mean I guess that’s kind of a choice.
Moreover, it was pretty comforting to know that I’m not the only one who sees it, which makes me feel a little less crazy.. and harsh. I still hope all is well, though.
I feel a bit more relaxed about everything now. There really isn’t much to worry about except maybe this test I am taking tomorrow and finals next week, and what I’m doing this weekend.
Speaking of which, I should go to sleep now.
Goodnight!
Everything you write, I find absolutely amazing. I won't elaborate, at least not right now, but your perspectives, even those you find not so ideal, are so eloquently conveyed by your words. Anyway, that's all. :)
Oh man, I don’t really know what to say, but thank you so much! :’)
asked by hendriiix |
3 days ago
With all that said,
I have made the decision to forget about what you said.
I do not care about your views on these things,
you aren’t experiencing it first hand.
So yeah to sum it up: screw you
Thinking about the future has made me pretty excited. It only makes sense because summer is so close-by, I got my SATs over with for now, nothing too bad is happening right now, the weather’s pretty nice, and I just exercised for about an hour and I feel pretty good about myself.
This past school-week has been pretty easy on me so far, despite all the upcoming tests and quizzes I have. I got this, I think — Well, I just have to keep working on it — but I think I got this. I don’t care if I have a week and a half left of school, I will not bs anything.
Basically, I want to spend this Summer with good company and strengthen friendships that I have that have been, in a way, put on hold for a while because of school and everything else. I also want to spend a good amount of time with family because.. they’re family! And I want to spend time with them while I can.
Anyway, I’m a little excited, so I’m going to set some goals/plans for this summer in list form:
- Catch up with friends
- Eat healthier (not less)
- Go to the flea market with Christine
- Have workout days with friends (and of course, keep doing what I do alone at the same time)
- Go to “Prom”
- Have San Francisco days
- Get my nails did with a certain someone
- Go over SAT practice things once a week
- Start planning for MTA2! ;)
- Spend quality time with my mum/family
- Re-organize my closet
- Go camping with the household group
- Visit colleges
- Go to Open Mics
- House of Soul Food
- Hair painting LOL
- Keep certain things in mind
- Go to workshops(? - I might just do this over Winterbreak because I know forsure there are a lot of local ones during that time)
- Love my dog more lol
- Get back into photography
I feel like there should be more, but this list is good enough for now. I’m sure there will be things that will pop up along the way anyway.
But yeeeeeees.
I’m pretty excited for these last days of school too, and I’m determined to tackle the next couple of weeks hella hard~ Work hard, party hard, yolololololol
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[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.] |
Pretty Wings | Maxwell
You toyed with my affliction
Had to fill out my prescription
Found the remedy, I had to set you free
Away from me
To see clearly the way that love can be
When you are not with me
I had to leave, I have to live
Nothing is at a constant.
And if it is, it eventually makes people upset.
I’m feeling unusually apathetic right now. It bothered me at first, and it still kind of does.
Though, I know I’ve got a lot to be thankful for. God has blessed me with great friends, opportunities, things to look forward to, a loving family, and more. And it’s great. I’m happy about that.
I always tell myself I need weekend or days to myself to do nothing and to spend time with myself. They’re nice, but they’re also kind of… I don’t want to say lonely.. so.. empty. In a way. I guess.
I mean I’ve been pretty productive and all, and I’ve been getting my grades up, and putting more effort into school, getting more sleep, eating better, and exercising more. It’s nice. I can’t say I’m unsatisfied. Just apathetic. And it’s whatever.
I guess I don’t need to feel anything right now, but I think I should. I miss people — I miss a lot of people. I think I’ve been spending too much time with myself. I need to find a middle ground. I need to be more appreciative of everything. I need to stop writing “I” statements.
Maybe I’m having major first world problems. This past year has been amazing, and I’ve met so many new people and experienced so many new things, and all of those things happened almost consecutively. I think I might have gotten so used to being around people that it’s harder for me to be alone.
I’m not depressed or anything. I think I’m just bored, and I have every reason not to be. Also, I dislike when people say “I’m bored” and don’t do anything about it except complain about how bored they are, so I’m gonna do something about it.
I’m not going to let tomorrow be a part of this “routine” I’ve got going on for myself. I refuse to let my day go how it did today, or the day before, or the day before that.
In a way, I do need these days alone to remind myself of these things. Bad habits can form gradually and inadvertently.
Besides, nothing is at a constant. I can’t get where I want to be without feeling like I’m falling a thousand steps behind every now and again. It happens. It’s a part of improving.
Okaaay so I’m going to go do something about this starting righhhhhhht
now.
Have a good night, y’all~
